About two months ago in our small group, the topic of politics came up. One of the people from our small group, without hesitation, said, "Well, this is MY president". This really caught me off guard. Really? He believes in everything you stand for? You believe in everything he stands for? What at the moment, does he stand for? (that is another topic for another day) And what is it about this person as a leader that makes you call him YOUR president?

It is really no surprise to anyone who knows me or reads this blog that I am not into politics. I really am not. And I certainly can't point to any one person being MY president. Or MY congressman, or MY anything when it comes to politics. I just don't believe in what they stand for strongly enough to believe that they are really representing me.

We have been keeping an eye on the Iran election and the aftermath of the results. Those people, thousands of them, are out in the streets, risking being hurt, or even worse, shot, for freedom. For something they believe in with their whole heart. How lucky we are to be Americans. As much as I disagree with some forms of government and as much as I believe there are some crooked things going on in the US, I also know that there is justice. There is no justice currently in Iran. There is no sense of right or wrong, at least not a common one. How terrible that is!
And those people in their green masks, throwing rocks and shouting, they believe in freedom. They demand freedom, and they believe that the leader who didn't win was THEIR president.

My friend HH sent me a letter recently from a member of his church. That church member is a very well respected Sunday School teacher and leader of the church. He isn't someone I know well, but I know him. He wrote a very beautifully stated letter to his church, standing up for the rights of Gay people. He took a stand. One that may or may not create problems within the church. One that may or may not cause him to lose friends. He stood in his street and yelled for rights for his daughter and all other Gay people who have been turned away from church because church members just don't "agree with their lifestyle".
He took a stand.

This has really gotten me to thinking lately about my slacktitude. Would I, if given the opportunity, take a stand on this or other issues? Is there an issue that leads me to the point of standing in my street and yelling to the rooftops? Is there something that I believe so strongly in that I would risk my friendships with people I work with? People I go to church with? People I live with? People I call close friends?
I am not sure, but I think I need to start thinking more about it.

Iranians believe that each one of them can make a difference. R, the man who wrote the letter to his church believed he could make a difference. Isn't it about time we all believed we could make a difference? And then stood up and shouted for what we believed in?

Happy Mother's Day

More from my school friends...

Well, my little friend J has some new gems!

When asked if he sleeps with a teddy bear at night, he said, "No, but I do have a glow stick". 

Me: a glow stick?  

J: Yes.  it lights up at night and we put it in the freezer in the daytime.  It gives me luck.  

Me: Seems a little cold.

J: yep, it is, but the cold gives it good luck!

It seems that J was leaving for a doctor's appointment one day and was quite excited about it.  That was all he could talk about, all he could think about, all he could write about.  So the next day, I naturally asked about the doctor's appointment.  

I am still not sure why he was taken to the doctor in the first place.  

Me: so, you went to the doctor yesterday.

J: Yep.  It was fun.  The doctor wanted to trade me for another kid.  He liked me the best.

Me: (yeah, some days I would like to trade you too... *just my thoughts people!) Really, that is really nice.  So what did the doctor do?

(still trying to figure out why he went to said doctor) 

J: Well, he poked me in the stomach and then he smelled me.  

Me:  He smelled you? Do you mean he checked your nose to see if you could smell? (he has had quite the runny nose lately...that would make sense.) 

J: No he smelled me.  Then he checked my smelling thing.  

Me: your smelling thing, you mean your nose?  The thing that helps you smell things?

J: (with a disgusted look on his face) Uh, NO!  My smelling thing.  

Ok, have fun with that smelling thing buddy.

My new friend M was drawing a picture of his family for me as an intro activity so I could know more about him before I start working with him.  I like to know how many siblings, pets, the kid has.  It helps to do writing later on in lessons.  So he is drawing his four brothers and little baby sister who's names all also begin with M.  Then he draws his mom and his dad.  

M:  My dad lives with us.  But the other dad's don't.  

Me: Other dads?  What other dads?

M: Well, My dad who lives with us, he is only my dad.  He isn't everyone else's dad.

Me: Oh, I see.  Other dads.  How many other dads are there?

M: Well, it is like ice cream!  We each get our own!

Ah, of course, the way it should be with ice cream and dads.  You each get your own.

Sure.

Homeless the Guard Cat.

In one of the Harry Potter books, not sure which one, Harry is at the home of his Aunt and Uncle.  (Isn't that the beginning of almost every HP book?) Anyway, outside, sitting under the porch light is a tabby cat.  Just sitting there.  Watching and guarding.  Soon, once the cat believes all is well, she shape-shifts into Professor McGonagall and runs away.  

Since about October, we have had visits from this white cat that lives in the neighborhood.  We haven't picked it up, so we aren't sure if it is a she or a he.  We made the classic mistake of feeding it once and it has come back often ever since.  Sometimes it helps BT outside with watering the plants, other times it just meows at the door over and over again.  B even got a small dog house to put on the back porch for it to live in when it was so cold so the cat wouldn't freeze.  I call him Homeless.  B calls him Mooch.  He really is too fat to be truly homeless.  

He went away for a while.  I hadn't seen him for a month or so until he showed up last night when our friend George came over.  Homeless loves George.  They are buddies.

So now, ever since, Homeless/Mooch has been parked underneath our porch light just waiting and watching.  Like Professor McGonagall, checking to make sure all is well.  

I am half expecting to peek outside and see him shape-shift into a person and walk away.  

Is it too much to imagine that person to be God?  or at least Dumbledore?

A girl can dream right?

  

Yep...

  I didn't make this but I wish I had. This just about sums it up!  If one more person reaches out to touch my belly fat, I am going to hit them. 

Baby is hiding deep inside there.  Right now it is just fat.   

And I don't want to hear about how painful other people's pregnancies are.  NO THANKS.  I am stressing enough.  I would like to live blissfully stupid when it comes to pushing a human being out of me. Thankyouverymuch.

More from my friend J.

Ok, so yesterday, we were reading a book titled The Water Park about animals going on the water slide.  So in writing, I suggested we write about playing in the water...

I thought that would be simple enough...

Me: So, J do you like to play in the water?  Have you ever been to a waterslide?

J: no.  Never.

Me: Really? How about a pool.  In the summer do you ever go swimming?

J: No. I don't have a pool at my house. 

Me: Me neither but sometimes I swim at other pools.  You don't?

J: No. I don't. (shakes his head like I am the craziest person on the planet)

Me: How about in the summer, do you like to play in the sprinkler or have water balloon fights or play with water guns?

J: No, I just play Goddess of Weather.  I told you this already.

Me: Yeah, I remember.

J: Oh, and I like to play the "pee outside" game.

Me: The pee outside game?

J: Yeah, I pee on trees.  My brother pees on trees.  My sister tries to pee on trees but it doesn't work. 

Sometimes here at school I pee on trees. 

So, friends, if you see a kid out in your yard, holding a stick and peeing on your tree, just tell him to get his power of rain and get off  your lawn.  Or throw a water balloon at him.  Then at least we will have something to write about on Monday!

Now for something completely different...

Because I am even boring myself with this pregnant girl talk...

I entertain you with stories from my school.

My new little boy who is truly an "odd bird" and I were talking about what he likes to do when he is at home. 

J: Well I love pink.  Did you know I love pink?  It is my favorite color of all times.  I love it all the time.  I love pink (insert Jazz Hands here).

Me: That is really nice.  I like pink too.  But I was asking you about what you like to do at home. 

J: Did you know spiders shoot webs out of their butts?  

Me: Interesting.  So are you going to tell me what you like to do at home?

J: Sure!  I like to go outside with my sister and my brother and we like to play, (Insert Superhero announcer voice here) Goddess of (not sure, he has a speech issue... sounds like Leather) 

Me: Goddess of Leather?  How do you play that game? (I am wincing as I wait for an answer) 

J: Not Leather! (rolls eyes like I am an idiot!) Goddess of Leather Leather!  (I swear that is what it sounded like to me) 

Me: I don't understand,  Goddess of Leather? 

J: You know, like winter, spring, Summer, you have rain and snow and...

Me: Oh!  Goddess of Weather!  I see!  (with quite the relieved voice) 

J: Yeah.  But you need sticks to play. 

Me: (furrowed brow) sticks?  What do you do with sticks?

J: You each pick one up and hold it in the air and you get the power of whatever weather.  Mine is the power of rain/wind.  (yes, he said slash!) 

Me: Ah, I see. And what can you do with the power of rain/wind?

J: You blow things up of course!  

Me: Of course! I should have guessed that!

J: And my sister has the power of snow.  My brother has the power of ice.  

Me: So could I play if I had a stick?  

J: No. You can only play at my house.  If you came to my house with your stick, you could play.  

Me: Oh, I see. 

J: Did you know what I did in the bathroom today before school started? 

(another wince moment... what do I say?  Sure! Tell me?  Uh NO! but he doesn't wait for me to respond)  I threw up.  It was gross.  It was that yucky donut from breakfast.  

Me: Yeah, I have that issue with Nacho cheese lately.  (but I am pregnant, what is your excuse?) 

On cafeteria duty this morning at breakfast.  

Me: (to a very round little boy) You need to come sit right here in this spot.  (To a smaller version of the round little boy) And you can sit right here with your brother. 

Round Little Boy: How did you know we were brothers?  

Me: Gosh, I don't know.  I guess I am just smart that way. (It has nothing to do with the fact that you could be twins!) 

RLB: You must be super smart to figure that out! 

Me: Yeah. That's me!  Goddess of Brilliance!

If J can be Goddess of Weather, I can be Goddess of Brilliance!

I think I might be understanding now...

When B and I lived in Indiana, we had the cutest little duplex.  We were young and married and loved to throw dinner parties.  I know. we were young and had all the time and energy in the world!  Oh to have some of that energy now just to clean the house!

So, one dinner party, we invited this couple who worked with B.  He was a nice guy, seemed down to earth and then there was the wife.  Ugh.  They looked JUST like a Barbie and Ken couple and she acted a little Barbiesque if you ask me.  She would complain about her husband in front of the group.  She told us a story about how a year before, husband had gotten her a blender for Christmas.  That was the big gift.  A blender.  She was a health nut and loved smoothies, so he got her a blender.  This gift made her so mad that she actually threw the blender at him while he was on the treadmill running one day.  Yeah. She was not my favorite person!

So at one particular dinner party, she was pregnant.  Not HUGE 8 months pregnant but like 4 months kind of pregnant.  Not really showing yet other than a little baby bump.  But she embraced being pregnant.  She sat in her oversized maternity shirt talking about her acid reflux, her back pain, and her morning sickness.  At one point, she made we rewash strawberries that were in a salad because she was worried they weren't quite clean enough for a "pregnant girl" to eat.  

I pretty much had decided she was an unpleasant person anyway, so it didn't surprise me when she griped so much about being pregnant.  Ugh. "You have acid reflux.  I get it!"

A friend of mine recently found out she was pregnant.  Two weeks later, she was announcing to everyone her baby news and started wearing big maternity shirts.  At the time I thought, "You are like three weeks pregnant.  Do you really need that shirt right now?"  

Both of those times must have made such an impact on me that I vowed not to be  like them.  I vowed not to wear maternity clothes until I HAD to.  (they are pretty ugly anyway) And I vowed to never talk about throwing up, acid reflux, or any other pregnancy related problem in a crowd.  

Yeah. Yesterday I broke all of the rules, I am ashamed to say. 

In the middle of the meeting, I started feeling bad.  Really bad.  But it was a familiar feeling.  Something I am used to by now.  Same sort of feeling I get when I drink any kind of lemonade.  Yep.  The dreaded acid reflux.

I couldn't avoid it.  I couldn't fix it.  I just had to sit there.  Now I will say that I didn't announce it to the planet..."Hey everyone!  I have acid reflux because of the baby!"  But when asked by the people sitting around me what was wrong, I did tell them.  Ugh. One step closer to being THAT pregnant girl.

Thursday, I tried on three shirts.  All of them a little too snug.  I could wear them but I would feel like a stuffed stuffed sausage.  I don't feel pregnant.  I just feel fat.  Ugh. So Friday, I figured what the hell?  I will wear the maternity shirt.  Why not.  Friday is a day to not worry about how I look and just be comfortable!  And HOLY CRAP!  I was so comfortable the entire day.  Maternity clothes are sooo nice.  Why don't they make stretchy maternity clothes for people who just ate too much for lunch?  OOOH. The best.  Even though I am not showing really, (I can still fit in to my regular jeans, thank you very much) I wore the shirt.  

I am beginning to get it.

And unfortunately, I am becoming "the pregnant girl".

OY.

Who am I?

I was reading Exodus last night.  Cramming you might say, for our church small group.  Every Tuesday night we get together and ask similar questions of one another.  Every once in a while, the question comes up, "What have you been studying lately?" and I almost never have an answer!  I am a slacker!  So I figured I would do some study and actually have an answer.  

So I started reading about Moses.  I mean this is a big major super hero of the Bible right?  He has movies made about him!  Although he will never have his picture on the cover of an Entertainment Weekly or a People Magazine, he is pretty famous man.  

So imagine my shock when old Mr. Moses, in the midst of talking to God and getting directions, stops and says, "Hey, don't you think you picked the wrong person?  Who am I to do this big job?  Do you realize how big a job this really is?"  And God with infinite wisdom kindly pats him on the back and reassures him. Sort of like, "Dude, I wouldn't have picked you if I didn't think you could do a good job. Duh."  Yeah, God talks like that some days, I am sure.

B and I found out in November that we were expecting.  Two pregnancy tests and we were pretty sure of the answer.  Since then, we have heard the heart beat, watched the baby wave and do back flips.  Each time I think about it, I get freaked.  There is a baby inside me!  Do you know what this means?  We are going to have a little human that we are responsible for!  A little human to take care of and make sure they learn and grow and become the best person they can be.  I am not going to lie about how much that freaks me out!  The magnitude of the freak-out is immense!  I keep thinking less about the baby part of this and more about the raising a human part.  What if I screw up?  What if I don't do the right thing?  What if I just suck as a mom?  It is possible, you know.  I am so used to my way of doing things, my quiet time, my schedule.  All of that is nul and void very soon.  What about that?  

I have asked God several times... "Who am I that you gave this baby to? You trust me?  Really?  Are you crazy?"  

And I never really got an answer.  Not till I read about Moses.  Even Moses got scared.  Even Moses was unsure of himself and his role in the world.  Even Moses questioned God.  And God just politely and kindly said, "You will do fine.  Just take it one step at a time, and trust me to do the rest."  

Just take it one step at a time and trust Me to do the rest.  

My friend Heidi was talking about shopping with her daughters the other day when they saw a friend of theirs with a very little baby.  The daughters both, being little girls, ooed and ahed over the baby asking their mother if they could have one.  Heidi joked saying, "SHHHH!  Not too loud!  God will hear you!"  

When she told me that story, I realized that God had heard me.  God had heard B. God had understood our desire to have a baby.  And God believed in both of us.  Each time I ask God "Who am I to take care of this little human coming in to the world?"  God always says in a kind way, "Just take it one step at a time and trust Me to do the rest."